I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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