Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize