I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
