Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Randomize
