I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
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