my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
