Sponge bath it is.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
