i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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