Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize
