Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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