I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
You can't special order awesome
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Randomize
