It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
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