I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
