So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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