im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
