i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
