why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Randomize
