If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Randomize
