Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
