He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
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