evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Can I color on your dick again?
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
