I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
