there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
