I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
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First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
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He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again