end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
