Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
