I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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