hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
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