so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Quick, to the slutcave!
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Randomize
