i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Do you have feelings for this penis?
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize