Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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