drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
