she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I love having hate sex.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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