Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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