just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
We left the knife in your bed.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
