Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Randomize