She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Randomize
