i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
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