Sponge bath it is.
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Randomize