Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
false alarm, still single
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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