babies were throwing up all over the place
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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