You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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