im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
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