I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
