we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
