Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
