I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
never play flip cup with pint glasses
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
