You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
