So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
