Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
