I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
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